Lessons from Moana

Parenthood is full of lessons. Every day I discover something new about myself. Between early mornings and late nights, seems like I’m stumbling along the way. Frustration is a normal with everything changing. Moana has given me a few life lessons, which I seem to put into my life.

  1. Who are you?

Moana is asking herself who she is meant be. In a way I’m searching for this new dude. As father, I’m simply confused with the lifestyle changes. Watching your kid grow up is a major change to your life. You become more emotional and asking yourself where the time went. Two months, she is barely rolling over and now she is almost crawling. With all that you are changing too. Running on very little sleep, asking yourself how much coffee is left in pot, and when can I shit in peace. Your body could be changing too. Gaining a few pounds or even losing a few pounds. Financial stress could be happening at your household. Either way you look at it, you’re asking yourself “Who have I become”

 

  1. Learning something new.

In the movie, Moana must learn to sail. As she starts to sail, she makes mistakes and stumbles along the way. That’s been my whole experience as a parent. Getting my finger covered in poop, guessing bottle measurements, and trying adjust my lifestyle to their routine. Moana meets Maui who teaches her how to sail.  My teacher was my mother, I have seven sisters. So I learned a lot already. But it’s different when it’s your own child. The only things I can say is keep on learning.

 

  1. Positive attitude.

At the worst of times you need to have a great attitude, even when things start to go bad. I get it; the kid could be cranky when driving somewhere. Take a breather, and relax. Nothing is going to get better if you have a shitty attitude; it’s going to get worse. You’ll most likely just get more frustrated and in turn so will they. I have done that to myself. It’s the worst feeling, I just felt defeated. Not because I was mad, just because I gave into myself. Remember kids grow and can be a pain in your ass. Be happy. And your welcome.

Parenting can be tough. But so is life. It sucks. The strange thing is that it only gets better, I promise that it will. The next time you are watching your kid’s favorite movie or show. Please and try to take a lesson away from it. Unless it’s Caliou, fuck that kid.  Otherwise turn on your favorite movie when the kid falls asleep.  After all, happiness is always key.

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Practice and Routine

Has anyone felt like they just can’t it together? Well that’s me, and the struggle is real. Now my struggle is just balance. Life can be so busy, between work, family and play. Lately I’ve trying to give my lifestyle a shock. I have a few plans I want to knock out before summer time ends. I feel like my life is just cramped, but I’m loving how busy I am. So let’s start the day off.

At 4:30 am I wake up. Barely waking up, get ready for work. Mostly I’m trying chug my pre-work before hopping into my car. Just sitting there vibing to rap music and buzzing off the juice. I arrive to the gym. The only goal is to get buff, thinking about my heroes; Arnold, the Rock, and Tom Hardy. The one thing that they have common is the body, and it’s built of Greek god. Me well, I’m built like a twig with eyes. So fuck it, we lifting heavy and everything. After a heavy lift, and feeling like biggest dude in the gym. It’s time for work.

By work, I mean it’s time to slay tree. Cutting trees, roping trees, and climbing trees, I’m tree guy. Before I get to do all that, my crew most likely has to hike into site. Hiking a few hundred meters or a simple one or two kilometer, my legs are tired. I thought I did cardio at the gym. Cutting trees can be tiring, so I honestly look forward to going to home. After the tiring day, it’s time to go home. See my kid and wife is the things I crave the most these days.

My drive is pretty calming, listen to podcasts or music. I’ve learned to enjoy the ride home, because it’s one of the few times I get alone. Skip ahead, I walk to the door. I hear screaming, it’s my daughter laughing at the TV. She is watching Moana for the thirtieth time. I am learning the songs, and hopefully going to put a cover album soon. I’m slowing learn “who I am”. Just like Moana. In the evening my little one gets tired, and I get the chance to hold her in my arms. I realized that kids don’t stay little for long. It kind of breaks my heart. Time is so precious.

As I put her to bed, I think about what the next day will bring.  I am only trying to pause time and live in the moment a little bit longer. These are the lessons I’m learning and the struggle is real. So tie up your boots and get grinding. Get the most out of your day, even if you’re tired. Trust me you’ll be happy you did.

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Pro Tip From An Okay Dad

1: Shitty pants When changing a diaper the most important thing is to make sure they are done pooping. Otherwise your day could get a lot shittier. Make sure you wipe their little tush really good and apply diaper cream. Diaper rash cream a pain in the ass. You don’t like your bum itchy pretty sure they don’t either. 
2: Quick draw

When your getting them dresses or undressed. Make sure you got our finger on the trigger when doing so. Triple check that they don’t roll over the edge when putting on pants. For fuck sakes, give them something to keep them occupied. Their is no point getting frustrated when they want to be naked and your trying to dress them. 
3: Suckers are for kids

Always have a soother. Know where they are at all times, because there is nothing worse than a screaming kid who only wants its soother. Common mistake is misplacing them. Remember the brand they like, they are picky little shits. Have more than just four in your house. They will be everywhere that you can’t find when you really need it. 
4: Put that shit on repeat 

When your kid finds something that they love and want all the time. Make sure you know it and have it always. Speaking from experience I know every single song from Moana. Some days that is the ONLY thing that will make her happy. Once you find what they like make their favourite thing your new favourite thing. 
5: Sneaky time

Want sexy time? You got to keep that shit quiet. That includes playing with the chicken or rubbing wood gentlemen. There is nothing more disappointing than having a boner and now having to explain yourself. Practice safe sex. Don’t want anymore running around right away. 

What time is it “Game Time!”

How could I forget to bring the bags or did I bring enough stuff to last a few hours in the hospital.  But first let’s start earlier that evening. In my mind there isn’t anything that can prepare for child birth. Honestly, I barely had anything ready. So I started packing up a few things up quickly. The two things I thought I needed, my iPad and my book. I really thought this experience would be beautiful and just like you would see on TV. She yelled from the top of the stairs on all fours “We need to go now.” I’m running and chucking shit into our car. I’m thinking in my head “Is this really happening?”  My wife barely waddled to car.

The closer we got to the hospital, my wife was trying to find calming routine while having contractions. So I thought the bright idea of turning on some Mike Stud, and of course I am singing along. Wrong idea, the ole pregnant lady wasn’t having any of it. As we pulled into the parking lot everything started to become a reality. I’m going to be dad. I wasn’t prepared.

We walked to check-in station. The nurse took my wife in, and left in waiting room. There I was alone. After 30 minutes I walked up to the desk and asked simply “Can I see my wife?” The nurse replied “Oh we forgot all about you.” Well that was weird. I barely got into see my wife before shit started to get intense. I remembered I have to grab bags. I told the nurse about what I forgot. Running to the car I go. As I returned to the room, it became go time. We started on the way to the delivery room.

My wife legs in stirrups. I felt useless. I became the best cheerleader and water boy I could be.  Just trying to calm my wife down through the contractions. “Push, push and breath” The nurse said calmly and cool. I was like “oh yeah, this is what they play for.” Fighting, being a coach, and fetching anything my wife needs, the end was near. “I can’t do this, I just a little break” my wife said. All of the sudden my child’s head appeared. I was getting pumped and emotional. I became overloaded with happiness and was fighting back tears. Doctor said “Dad look, it’s a?” “It’s a girl!” I yelled. But that yell wasn’t heard by anyone. Well, because I thought it. Again I said “it’s a girl.” It came out so depressing. I was so pumped that I had just became a dad to a little girl. But let’s be honest, I really wanted a boy.

This little creature, with the softest blue eyes, gazed upon mom and dad “like whom the fuck are you, and why is it so cold.” It was the greatest moment in my life. No really it was. Then my mind wandered “how are you going to do this.” At the time we had no money, just barely getting by. The thing was though; a family’s love is one of the most powerful things. So, I’d say the struggle can suck, but all it takes is one beautiful miracle.

 

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